being a mother means learning the true meaning of sleep deprivation

being a mother means making no plans for the mornings because i never know how the nights are going to go

being a mother means I've traded in my purse for a diaper bag

being a mother means getting used to the smell of spit up on my clothes

being a mother means planning my day in two and a half hour increments

being a mother means learning how to multitask, and do things with a baby over my shoulder

being a mother means falling hopelessly in love with a twenty inch, nine pound boy

being a mother is exhausting, frustrating, demanding, thrilling, exhilarating, and I'm loving every second of it

i always loved words. they helped me daydream, express my feelings, and communicate with others.

but there are no words to describe the feeling i had when i held my son for the first time yesterday :)

i sort of assumed pesach at my in laws wouldn't be that different than succos at their house. but that was before we decided to go for the first days.

of all the Jewish holidays, pesach is the biggest when it comes to family traditions. and my family is full of them. from the tunes, to the songs, to the food, and just about everything in between, i always knew my family did it differently. my mother makes food from scratch, like mayonnaise, strawberry jam, orange juice, chocolate syrup, tomato sauce...it might taste a little different, but once you get used to it, it's very earthy and wholesome. the seder might go until 2 am because my family has songs for everything, and there are some divrei torah that are said every year, even though we all know them by heart already.

on the flip side, my mother in law buys pesach processed things, so there was ketchup and soda, potato chips taffies. and my father in law is a rabbi so he has to "work" the day after the seder, so the seder is slightly shorter (by about two hours) the tunes they sing are different, and even the way my husband's family reads the haggada is different from what i was used to.

i missed my mother's traditional chocolate mousse and cucumber salad, but my mother in law has her dishes that she makes every pesach that my husband and his siblings look forward to.

it wasn't difficult to be with my "other family", it was just different. and I'm looking forward to spending the second half of yom tov with my side.

people love to complain about change.

Facebook obviously has a lot of issues because they're changing the layout every five months, and they sneak in subtle changes in between. for the first two weeks after the changes have been made, everyone groans and talks about how they want the "old layout back" but they fail to remember that they complained just as much when the old layout was the new one.

so i usually wait to get accustomed to changes before I'm so quick to complain. that's why I've waited since the summer to comment on the changes in the Starbucks i often frequent. they changed the whole look of the place, down to the tables and chairs. there is now a three foot table which is great for accommodating large books plus a laptop and notes. but the chairs are really, REALLY uncomfortable. they're rounded wooden chairs with a little lip around the edge which makes it uncomfortable to sit for more than ten minutes. there used to be two big green poufy chairs at the window, which were almost never unoccupied. they got rid of those chairs too, and now there are four brown leather chairs, which aren't nearly as comfortable. at least they've made the music a little quieter. some of the other changes are more subtle; they now keep the sleeves at the counter and you can opt not to take one, the counter with the sugar, straws, milk, and napkins are closer to the door (which makes sense)

i say bring the old chairs back. and get rid of the new barristas. they make a racket, and are always laughing hysterically, at a decibel level which is too loud to be polite for public. and it's not because I'm getting old. it's because they're loud.

as a little kid i loved getting the mail. there's a satisfaction in opening the mailbox to see it stuffed with envelopes. and on occasion there was actually an envelope with my name on it.

these days, getting the mail is a lot less exciting. we don't get that much mail-we pay our bills and do banking online. most of our mail is the rent stub or a wedding invitation, and the monthly magazines that we get. but yesterday i got an envelope with my name on it that i was not excited to see at all.

it was from the Jury Department. i know, it's all part of being an adult and good citizen, bla bla bla. to me it means yet another hassle to deal with. at least I'm not missing work, and i don't have kids so i don't need to find arrangements for that. but it also means that i don't really have a plausible excuse for missing it. it's in the beginning of April, so i can't use pesach as an excuse, and it's on a Monday so i might not even be able to use school to get out of it. it's probably worth it to do it now and then not have to worry about it for awhile.

still, I'm not looking forward to it.

life is a series of ups and downs. sometimes bad things happen that set you back, and leave you stunned for a bit, and sometimes good things happen that leave you with a good feeling for a bit. recently we've had a high point in my family, which left many of our family members with the good feeling.

my siblings and i made a surprise party for my parent's anniversary.

they had a milestone this year, and as their children, we felt it appropriate to celebrate with more than just the usual card/gift. my mother is not really one for surprises, but my dad loves them. and what better way to show the two people in your life that have done the most for you than by throwing them a party?

we started planning months ago, from the food to the decorations. we split up the chores and the phone calls, and got to work. brother1 is away in school, sister2 has a busy senior year schedule, and brother2 is at school till late at night, but they all pitched in with their opinions and help whenever possible.

we were sure my parents (especially my mother) suspected something was up when brother1 called my mom on Thursday to tell her he was coming home for shabbos because he "needed a break", or when i called to invite them for melava malka, but my mother's face when she walked in the door proved that we had successfully pulled off the party.

the aunts and uncles and grandparents helped with the food preparation, and my siblings decorated my apartment with lots of signs and appropriate colors for the milestone. Mr. FCG did his part by shlepping soda and chairs up the stairs and taking the decorations off the ceiling the next morning. who needs a step stool when your husband is over 6 feet tall?

the food was great, nobody spilled on the couch, the speech was nice, and my parents loved the party. the Far Away Aunt and Uncle got to join in the celebration with the help of Skype, and we all went to bed exhausted but happy.

happy anniversary! we hope to celebrate many more with you!

there are two kinds of snow days

the kind i had last week was the productive kind. i was up relatively early, and since i had a lot of time and not that much to do (beginning of the semester is usually pretty quiet) i cleaned the entire apartment from top to bottom; swept, dusted, mopped, vacuumed, washed anything that wasn't sparkling, refolded the linen, cleaned out the fridge, and rearranged the cabinets. at the end of the day i felt very accomplished, but could not move. i literally collapsed on the couch.

this week i had another snow day. i stayed in bed till much later and didn't do much besides for some laundry. sister2 came over and we baked-or more accurately, i baked and she sat and chatted with me while i measured and poured. unfortunately the cookies came out nasty and I'd used up some of my baking supplies so i couldn't try another recipe. we ate and made smoothies and looked at stupid videos on YouTube. at the end of the day i was also exhausted (doing nothing is very tiring!) but instead of a clean apartment i had counters full of dirty dishes and laundry that needed to be folded lying on my bed. definitely not the most productive of days.

but now that I've had both, I'm ready to be finished with snow days for the rest of the semester. as is everyone else in New York. all anyone's been tweeting, blogging, or facebooking about has been the snow. and football. and foot fetishes. thankfully that's going to be over after Sunday.