yesterday i made record time. i was at a vort for three minutes.



as i mentioned previously, sister1's best friend got engaged last week, and my mother insisted that i go to the vort. so i put on a coat, applied makeup, and let down my hair. i walked in, found the kallah and her mom, said mazal tov, acknowledged family members who present, and walked home. it was a total waste, because the only people who even noticed me at the vort were my parent's, sister1, her best friend, and her friend's mom. as if they haven't seen me with curly hair or no makeup. but my mom insisted that i "had to be seen" i hate that expression. it's right up there on the list with "on the market" makes me feel like a slab of meat. I'm getting auctioned off to the highest bidder. maybe we should all get on a platform and prospective mothers-in-law can come inspect us and check out our teeth. or watch us perform demonstrations of dish washing, bed making, diaper-changing and house-cleaning.

but i can't complain. because then it might imply that G-d forbid i don't want to get married.

but then again, anyone who hears me say this and mistakes my tongue-in-cheek for complaining, probably doesn't have a very good sense of humor, and chances are, i don't want to marry any offspring of theirs anyway.