weddings

i went to a wedding a few weeks ago. that's always a long haul. it's probably easier for guys because they don't have to do the whole hair and makeup thing, and my friend said once you cover your hair it cuts down preparation time in half. add a two hour drive, and a final the next day, and i really didn't want to go. but the girl getting married had once upon a time been a good friend of mine, and i had personally promised her I'd be at her wedding, so i dutifully told my boss i had to leave early, and sailed out of my office at three, with my co-workers glaring at me behind my backs-not really, everyone else in my office takes very long lunch and mincha breaks and i usually work through lunch.

so i go home and wonder to myself who the idiots are who decided that heels are the height of fashion-it must have been a guy. or did some crazed female put them on and think to herself "my toes are cramped, my muscles are screaming in agony...now THIS feels good!" ? i have one friend who always wears heels. she's practically more comfortable in heels than flats! she got it from her mother who also always wears flats. i tell her all the time that i can swear she must have barbie feet. y'know, the toes are permanently pointing downward, leaving her no choice but to wear flats....

i left a half hour later because my friend wasn't ready, and i had to stop for gas because i forgot to fill up in advance and it took my friend awhile to figure out how to pump (guess she doesn't fill up her daddy's car) but the ride was ok, with only minimal traffic. still, we got there just in time to hear everyone shout mazal tov and listen to all the chosson's friends sing od yishama completely out of sync with the band. (funny, you'd think that after enough weddings, they would learn the correct beats)

the families were both from out of town-meaning out of the tri-state area-but they all flew in for the wedding, for various reasons, some of which i still do not get. the wedding was nice though, i subjected my friend to the usual wedding rants; why do they play that song about getting ready for shabbos at all weddings, even if they're on Sunday nights?why do all those women in black hover around the tables looking for prospective daughters-in-law? can't they see I'm trying to eat my carbs? don't they notice that I'm trying to have a conversation with my friend whose now freezing in nervousness and doesn't want to talk for fear of saying anything too liberal and being overheard? and what's the deal with the whole umbrella thing? it just costs money to rent from a gemach, everyone looks sweaty in the picture and the kallah looks terrified because she's perched precariously on top of a rickety table, the little nieces start crying because they can't reach a string, and it costs more money to have it fixed after half the strings rip off because everyone is tugging at them.

the dancing was not so bad because the hall was huge, with ample room (although somehow, i still managed to get stepped on) the funny thing about dancing is that it's the only time I'm willing to grab a random sweaty stranger's hand. but i draw the line when they're holding a dirty tissue (and this has happened to me) i mean, do you really think you can blow your nose while your dancing?

so all together, it wasn't a bad night, and as i eased my aching toes out of my shoes and set my car onto cruise control, i figured that I'd had fun, saw some old friends, and i hope my friends will one day make the trek for me