Tuesday, May 13, 2008

you can do it, but we're so not helping!

my dad had to make a trip to home depot today to buy some piping and other things for our pool. i love spending time with him so i offered to come along.

big mistake.

home depot is not a store for girls.

as we were pulling in, i rememebered the other times i've been to home depot in high school. once to buy four 10 lb. bags of sand. and once to buy three 15 ft. pipes.

i never thought there could be so many different kinds of sands. there was a whole aisle just for sand. to me, sand is sand. ok, there's white or yellow, but that's just about it. so i finally choose the bags i want and of course i dragged the bags all the way to the check out counter to find that one of them had a whole in it-i looked behind me and-yup, there was a trail of sand all the way from the last aisle, through the entire store.

i'm not even going to elaborate on what happened with the poles, but at one point, i was holding them under my arms when my friend called my name from behind me. i swung around, and some poor innocent old man lost his hat.

so needless to say, i was less than thrilled to be back.

now here's a lesson for when you go to Home Depot: make sure you know exactly what you're looking for. i mean like th e size, shape, color, and even then you'll have about fifteen different ones to choose from. we must have spent a good twenty minutes looking at little screwy things that go on the end of the pipes.

i was put in charge of the cart. you know the home depot carts, the fifteen foot stage on wheels with the bars on top. pulling that was like driving a truck. imagine having to parallel park a suburban by hand. that's how i felt when i tried to pull my cart over to the side of the aisle. plus i had four ten foot pipes sticking out of the ends-and i was on the phone-they really can give out tickets for that. i ran over my own feet like six times, banged into at least three other carts, and only knocked over one display. then while i was trying to get my cart on line to pay, a guy came overe and started talking to me. i think he only wanted to ask where the line ended, but hello, did he not SEE i was having a difficult time and was not capable of communicating because i was busy muttering obscenities at my cart under my breath? and the guys who work there are anything but helpful. they just zoom around on those moving stepladder things, honking at people and terrorizing old ladies looking at bathtubs.

so the next i go there, i'm going equipped with steel toed boots and a bottle of prozac


MAK said...

Home Depot is impossible. That's why I always go with my brother, and make sure that he knows exactly what we're getting, because I have not the slightest clue.

The Babysitter said...

I went to Home Depot once to get screws for my rollerblade, thankfully I brought along an old screw and rollerblade to test to see if it can fit in before I bought any.

But while I was there I remember seeing these wooden gate things that were very cheap, and at the time we were going succah shopping, and that looked like a very cheap alternative, for accomplishing the same purpose, but of course we didn't get it, instead we got the Lighters Succah.

But yea, huge stores like that aren't meant for browsing, you have to know what you want in order to find it.